February 7, 2013 by lucieromarin
Some years ago, a bishop told me that, in seminary, the men were asked, “If a man is in a sinking boat with his mother and his wife, and he can only rescue one of them, which should he choose?”
“His wife!” I exclaimed.
“Nope,” said the bishop. “He has to save his mother’s life, because she gave him life.”
“Well,” said I, “if anyone ever proposes to me, I’ll ask him the same question. If he answers correctly, I’ll tell him to become a priest. If he answers incorrectly I’ll tell him he must never teach theology, but he can be my husband.”
“Hmmmph,” the bishop said.
Remembering this put me in mind of the sort of book you can get these days which is filled with tricky questions designed to stimulate discussion or entertainment, or both. As I have absolutely no profound thoughts at all to offer today, I thought I’d make some up Catholic-themed questions, and here they are:
1. Would you rather be stuck for ten years in a parish with the world’s worst preacher or the world’s worst choir?
2. Would you rather be a St Monica, and convert only one person, but that person be as great as Saint Augustine, or be like St Francis de Sales, and convert about 72,000 people, of whom none become as great as St Augustine?
3. You are in a liturgical choir with a super-strict choirmaster and a picky congregation. You make a horrible mistake in the Gradual verse. Would you rather that the congregation hears it, but your choirmaster misses it, or that the choirmaster hears it, but the congregation misses it?
4. Alas! A friend has gone horribly astray. Would you rather discover that she’s involved with a false apparition, or a conspiracy theory?
5. Would you rather hear bad advice from someone you’ve always trusted, or good advice from someone you’ve never trusted?
6. You arrive just in time for the Pontifical High Mass. There are only two seats left in the entire chapel. One is next to a weird and malodorous guy. The other is next to the world’s brattiest and ill-disciplined children. Where do you sit?
7. Would you rather that your secret thurifer crush finally notice you on the day when you have on a flattering dress, but an unflattering haircut, or a flattering haircut and unflattering dress?